Our family have worked through some major life changes in the last few months.  Moved country, sold our home, given up our dog, new job, new schools, new friends and I’ve (temporarily) given up sweets.  These are all major changes. All. Of. Them. I’m not an expert in child psychology or parenting, but I generally fulfil the role of Change Management Co-ordinator in our family, so I thought I would share some things I’ve learnt along the way. As I said in Part One, children do adapt to change but it takes time and they need help to navigate through the choppy waters of change.  As their parents, we are in the best position (frankly it’s our responsibility) to help them along the way.  And at the same time, parents can make things harder if they’re not switched on to the version of events as experienced by the little people. Something I realise now I have hindsight on the first half of this year. It’s not surprising, given I blog, that I believe when you know …

There are many observations and pearls of wisdom that I have heard over my time as a parent: “It gets better” “Try not to be anxious about it, they smell your fear.” “Oh I breastfed my children until they were one and they never get colds.” “You can’t give in to them or they will just keep doing it.” “I’m sure that’s perfectly normal but perhaps just go to the doctors to check it out.” “My my, what spirited children you have.” In relation to all this moving around the world business we keep subjecting them to (OK it’s only been twice in five years but it feels pretty regular from where I’m sitting), you often get one of the most popular phrases about children said to you: “Children are really resilient, they will adapt to the changes.” And it’s true.  Children are resilient and they do adapt. However, that 10-word sentence does not tell you how they will adapt, or what you should do to help them through change, or at what point you …

Over the last month we have had several episodes of sweet stealing by Jackson.  He literally can sniff them out and it doesn’t matter how high they are hidden, he manages to get to them.  This boy can’t put on his velcro fastening trainers but he can get a chair, climb onto the kitchen counter and get sweets from the highest shelf in the cupboard.  I need to hide chocolate in the bottom of his shoes clearly. To be honest I find it pretty amusing and somewhat impressive.  I know, I should be mortified by him consuming a whole pack of Haribo Sours before breakfast.  And I am, but I also love his cheek. In a way he’s helping us all to be more healthy, because we’ve basically been forced to not have any sweets in the house.  If they’re not available then they can’t tempt a four year old to a life of crime or be used as an emotional prop by two shattered parents on a Friday night.  Everyone’s a winner. It reminded me of …

In less than a week, our little man is going to graduate from toddler to full-blown child. In celebration of this “coming of age” I thought I would share a few things I have learnt in the last four years.  ‘Lessons by Jackson’, if you will. One of my earliest revelations after Jackson arrived was that even though your little people share the same genes, womb and passage out into the world, they are really very different.  I know this is obvious but when you are barely sleeping at night, you spend your days changing nappies and feeding people that can’t work a toaster or peel a banana, you could miss a bus falling on your house, so it took a while for me to realise what worked for Minnie was going nowhere with Jackson. Minnie screamed for the first three months of her life, Jackson seemed to be stunned into silence for the first six months of his life. Food was interesting and attractive to Minnie, Jackson refused anything other than milk until he was …

When you have a young family, sometimes a lesson to be learnt trumps fun times together. It’s a lovely Autumn day and we thought going to the park would be fun for all of us. That is until Jackson decided he was going to bring his cars, about 50 of them, in a box, that they didn’t fit into. At that moment I saw the opportunity for a lesson in taking responsibility for your things and kissed goodbye to fun in the park. We explained what we were planning to do – we’ll be walking a lot. Gave him clarity on the help we would give in carrying his cars – none. Suggested an alternative – don’t take the whole box, just take one or two that will be easy to carry. Reminded him that his cars were his responsibility – not ours. We went through this three times before arriving at the park and still he wanted to bring them. Within two minutes of walking Jackson had had enough carrying his cars. His arms …

Over a month ago my little girl turned three.  It was a long awaited day, although not as long awaited as five will be – since two and a half she has been trying to convince anyone who asks that she is five years old.  But this November we settled for three and she did it in style. Her party came first.  It would seem there are many little girls in the city of Christchurch that were born in the month of November so we found our slot in a long line of birthday parties.  And we had ourselves a Madhatter Tea Party, I was going for the Johny Depp version – Minnie was thinking along different lines….PINK! I’m an event manager so planning wasn’t too much of an issue.  Games, check. Party bags, check. Invitations, out. Menu, planned. Large, pink hat shaped, way more than I can manage cake, committed. As with any event, the weather is the only detail you can’t control but thanks to our ever faithful God it was perfectly tuned …

I took my son for his first haircut today.  This was the first haircut I have taken one of my children to.  Yes Minnie is nearly three, but she has gorgeous blonde curls so I’m just letting them grow until they turn into a bird’s nest.  Plus my sister has told me so many horror stories about how hairdressers butcher curls I feel a responsibility to protect her from the abuse. Before I took my son for his haircut he looked like the little baby above. After his haircut (which ran really rather smoothly thanks to a pack of chocolate raisins) he looked like this. How to age your child in 15 minutes.  I now have a little boy.  Now I just need to get him to walk…