Having a job is a big part of emigrating. In fact, it’s necessary if you want to stay.

Our motivation to move to New Zealand in the first place was to bring our children up somewhere beautiful and wholesome and we wanted an adventure. Thankfully, Gareth worked for a global engineering company that could facilitate that.

Due to a natural disaster, the job became much more than a way to get a visa. It was an opportunity to pursue his career, using his skills (and gaining lots more) whilst working within a team of highly motivated and inspiring colleagues to literally rebuild a city after devastating earthquakes had flattened it. A job that makes a difference, how satisfying is that.

Five years later, we moved back to the UK because Gareth’s dad was sick and at the same time he found that out, his company offered him an opportunity to work on a big, ambitious project.

The third emigration was because we didn’t feel like we were done with New Zealand and wanted to go back for more time. His team in Christchurch welcomed him back with open arms and we were able to move back.

Almost six years later, and due to homesickness (on my part), wanting to be closer to family, giving our children a wider choice for higher education and ultimately believing that the UK was the right place for us to be for the foreseeable future, we bounced back. This time, the move presented a chance for Gareth to nudge his career in a slightly different direction, pursuing what he loves the most, programme delivery.

The pressure to have a job so we can move countries has always fallen squarely on Gareth’s shoulder. Since we had children, he has been the main breadwinner in our family. This was a conscious, joint decision we made which has served our family well and allowed Gareth and I to work in our strengths. Happily, the burden of being the main breadwinner has also allowed him to advance in a career he loves (most of the time).

That said, on top of my unpaid work as primary caregiver to Gareth and our children, I have generally had paid work too.

When we moved to NZ and the children were babies, I took a minute to get us settled but soon landed freelance event management and fundraising work for various post-earthquake endeavours.

The year back in the UK in 2017, gave me a unique moment in my life where I didn’t work for over 12 months. This moment of no bosses, clients, targets or income requirements gave space for a career change into writing, giving me time to get qualifications in copywriting and proofreading.

When we returned to NZ, I landed in Christchurch with a job. Not in writing and not enjoyable, but helped us buy our dream house so it served its purpose. I still don’t know how I stuck out almost a year there!

This brings us to now. I’ve been working freelance for five years, building up experience in copywriting, proofreading and project management for much-loved clients down under. All of which I gradually said goodbye to to give me the time and capacity to coordinate our fourth international move; tasks included selling a house, booking flights and accommodation, transporting our dog, organising a summer with no fixed-abode, picking a town to land, finding a school, supporting Gareth and the children as they braved being the new person at work/school, buying a house and so many more things that are part of moving a family of four with a dog across the world.

All that’s done now, and I need want work. I have the privilege of not needing to work to pay the bills, but income for all the extras and unexpected would certainly be welcome. Where should I look? Who should I ask? Does it need to be the dream job? What even is that anyways? Should I look for challenging or easy? Part-time, full time? Employed or freelance?

All I know is that as always, the paid has to balance with the unpaid. That is the primary requisite for a mum that would like to work on top of looking after her family. The paid work, has to fit with the unpaid (so much more important) work of supporting my children as they become adults.

Don’t stumble on the ‘much more important’ part of what I just wrote. That doesn’t mean I consider my paid work as not important. I have almost always chosen work for its value and meaning (when I haven’t, it has not gone well). To get paid to do something that brings good into the world is the goal always. But it takes the absolute best of a person to nurture kind, honourable, intelligent, healed and whole people. The world needs them more than a well crafted marketing campaign or an event delivered on budget.

Still, I can do all that human-raising and have time for some other worthy work. I’m asking – where do you start when you arrive back in your home country, having not worked here for 12 years, living in a town you hadn’t stepped foot in six months ago, with 30 years of experience that is so varied there is no job that can utilise it all.

Please don’t say LinkedIn.